When You Have Every Right to Be Angry, But Anger Could Cost You

About the Presentation

There are times when you have every right to be angry. Someone hurt you. You were treated unfairly. Nobody listened to you. Someone made a decision that affected your life without really understanding what was happening. Sometimes anger is a completely reasonable response to what you’ve been through.

But being justified in your anger doesn’t mean every decision you make while you’re angry is going to help you.

I learned that the hard way.

My own experiences with CPS, family court, the criminal justice system, and incarceration put me in plenty of situations where I was angry, frustrated, scared, and tired of feeling like other people had control over what happened next. I also learned that there are moments when reacting out of that anger can cost you, even when the anger itself is completely valid.

In this talk, we’re going to have an honest conversation about what to do with anger when you can’t afford to let it make the decisions for you.

We’ll talk about:

• What your anger may actually be telling you. Instead of immediately trying to get rid of it, we’ll look at what’s underneath it and why that matters.
• The difference between feeling angry and reacting from anger. You’re allowed to feel every bit of it and still decide that your first reaction isn’t your best next move.
• Why stuffing it down isn’t the answer either. This isn’t about smiling, staying quiet, or pretending something doesn’t bother you just to keep the peace.
• How to give yourself enough space to decide what happens next. Especially when the stakes are high, a pause can be the difference between doing what feels good for five minutes and doing what actually protects what matters to you.
  
  

You don’t have to stop being angry to move forward. Sometimes you just have to stop letting anger choose the direction.